Sometimes it feels like the universe is against you. It may even feel like (if you believe) that God is against you. I know I have been feeling that way lately. I have been feeling that way for a few months now and it doesn't seem like its getting any better. That's when it hit me. I have been looking for help in all of the wrong places.
I have a tendency to fall in and out of routines, especially when it comes to my faith. There are days I feel like God is on my side and then there are those days where I struggle with my faith. I have been having the latter lately and maybe that is why I'm feeling such jealousy and anger towards others who can't help the situation that they are in. I am not putting my faith in God and his plans for my life.
Many struggle with this and I know I'm not alone. Whether we want a car, baby, money, or a house, everything has to do with God's timing and his plan for our life.
As humans we have this need to be in control. We want to know every detail so that we can plan for the bumps along the way. We want to know how every situation will turn out even before a situation arises and we get frustrated when something doesn't go our way. Jealousy is a big part of this. We see friends, family getting married, having children, or buying a house or car and want that too. We ask the main question, "When will it be my turn?" or we go above and beyond to find shortcuts to get us what we want. When will we realize that we will never work.
God isn't the bad guy, our emotions are and we need to stay strong in our faith and trust God. In my situation, I feel like I will never understand what God's putting me through. It seems like something new brings me down everyday but then again I haven't been trusting him like I should. A pastor back home once said, you are either getting ready for a trial, going through a trial, or getting out a trial but that cycle keeps repeating. All I know at this point is I need to keep my mind and heart on God. I need to trust him and know that he will see me through. He knows our needs better than we do and his timing is always right.
A very good article to read about this
http://livingbyfaithblog.com/2012/04/17/the-bible-and-jealousy-how-to-fight-the-fight-of-faith/
